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Welcome to my blog.

30 December, 2007

[CARTOON] Christmas Gift Returns




Why use long line-ups to disuade shoppers from returning merchandise to the store, when you can just hire Koko!

28 December, 2007

[CARTOON] Martha Stewart Taser


Keep your taser warm this holiday season with this easy to make taser cozy!

26 December, 2007

[CARTOON] Snow Removal Made Easy



That time of the year again when chatter turns to stories of how long it took for the plows to clear the streets after the winter storm(s).

25 December, 2007

[CARTOON] Christmas Mass



Amaze your friends with saying Merry Christmas in these different languages:

Korean - Sung Tan Chuk Ha
Hawaiian - Mele Kalikimaka & Hauoli Makahiki Hou
Mongolian - Zul saryn bolon shine ony mend devshuulye
Tasmanian - munto ag lag unti frinto ling dum ach tak
Zulu - Sinifesela Ukhisimusi Omuhle Nonyaka Omusha Onempumelelo

22 December, 2007

[CARTOON] Gift Cards


Well, it's Christmas time and there is always that one person (or two) that are hard to buy for. I was thinking about that this morning in a half-groggy state when this cartoon idea hit me.

18 December, 2007

Cartoon about office budgets


If you're on Toronto city council, you get an office budget of $53,000. Recent reports of mis-spending the office budgets on limo rides, expresso machines and even bunny suits inspired the cartoon. They're coming out with new spending rules but not until spring... it's Christmas time afterall.

16 December, 2007

Cartoon about smoking in cars


In Canada, one province has already banned smoking in cars in which there are children under 18 present. But what if your kid smokes?


Cartoon published December 13, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

14 December, 2007

Cartoon about Major League Baseball



...and here I thought that the current Major League Baseball logo was a batter holding a bat. Nope, it was a syringe full of steroids!

Link to the Mitchell Report: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitchell_Report_(baseball)

Cartoon published December 20, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

12 December, 2007

Cartoon about fake bombs


Last year the museum in Toronto opened a new addition to the musem called "The Crystal" (pictured in the cartoon) to a fair amount of critism. Last week a Toronto art student put a fake bomb in an alley next to the city's museum as part of his "art project". Police were called in and a charity function at the museum had to be cancelled costing the charity over $100,000... and inspired a cartoon.

10 December, 2007

Cartoon about City Hall spending



This cartoon almost wrote itself. Last week a city councillor in Toronto was punished for not spending a penny of his $53,000 office budget. Instead he paid for stationary and the like with his OWN money. All this in a city that is forecast to have a 300 million dollar budget shortfall.

08 December, 2007

Cartoon about tasers



Two taser related deaths in one week prompted the question: What do you get the taser enthusiast for Christmas?

07 December, 2007

Cartoon about Global Warming





An "oldy" that I threw in with a fresh batch of cartoons for my editor in Toronto. Last week there were winter storm warnings in EVERY part of Canada with the exception of the NorthWest Territories (the land closest to the north pole). Go figure!

Cartoon published December 6, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

03 December, 2007

[CARTOON] Underage Driver



Based on a true Toronto news story in which a 14 year old was able to buy and drive a car before he crashed it. In the same week, there were reports of a person masquerading at night as a taxi driver. He would take your visa card, then hand you back a fake one. Hopefully there are no fake proctologists out there...

30 November, 2007

[CARTOON] The Grey Cup


This cartoon was inspired by the Grey Cup (Canada's equivalent of the superbowl in the Canadian Football League), and an old commercial for Grey Poupon.

For those not familiar with the Grey Poupon commercial, there's a scene about it in the Wayne's World movie. I also found a link to the original commerical on YouTube at....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_pGT8Q_tjk

PS: Saskatchewan beat Winnipeg.

29 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Endangered species


Meet four endangered species of Ontario, Canada. Unfortunately 3 of the 4 can't sell their land to residential developers for a few million bucks.

Please feel free to visit my blog and vote using the newly installed "5 star" ranking system. Your feedback is invaluable. Although this cartoon was picked by the editor for publication, there were 7 others in the batch that I thought were "better". I will post some of those in the days to come....


Cartoon published November 29, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

28 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Affordable Housing



Based on a true story. Located in Southern Ontario, the Region of Peel is comprised of the City of Brampton, City of Mississauga and the Town of Caledon.
The population of Peel is approximately one million, which represents 8.7% of Ontario’s population. It is growing rapidly. Peel has the second-fastest rate of population growth in Ontario and one of the fastest in Canada. This rate of growth puts pressure on every corner of the community and exacerbates many of the challenges faced. Keeping up with the growth has become virtually impossible for agencies seeking to deliver services and programs. Waiting lists for social services are increasing. Delays in receiving services can create new, more serious problems. Among the many problems are children with mental illness or developmental disabilities going untreated. The explosive population growth has precipitated an urgent need for an increase in social and health services, as well as housing, schools and transportation. But financial resources have been limited in addressing these issues. The waiting list for affordable housing is 21 years!

24 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Auto sector



Inspired by the old adage: if you think you have it bad, someone else probably has it worse.

22 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Santa Claus Parade 2007






Mix in a Santa Claus parade with some toy recalls, and you get an outstanding parade float idea...

Cartoon published November 22, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

21 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Dogs Playing Poker



Inspired by those famous paintings of dogs playing poker.

Everything you wanted to know about dogs playing poker but were afraid to ask:

Click Here

20 November, 2007

[CARTOON] World's Largest Odour Eater


Recently a Guiness World Record was set in Toronto for the largest Christmas stocking full of gifts for the less fortunate. The cartoon above features Toronto City Hall in the background (grin).

Here's a link to the photo:
http://blogto.com/city/2007/11/come_stuff_the_worlds_biggest_stocking/


18 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Aqua Dots



Aquadots, or Aqua Dots as they are sometimes called, have been recalled from all US retailers. The recall is over whether a Chinese subcontractor replaced a glue component with one that mimics the effect of rohypnol, the so called date rape drug. Thus if a child swallows some of the beads they can become comatose, as has happened to at least two children.

If you were a fiction writer, you just couldn't come up with something like this.

15 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Curious George gets recalled



Recently there was yet another toy recall. Curious George dolls were found to contain 10 times the legal maximum amount of lead. News is George did not take the news well from the Man in the Yellow Hat.


Cartoon published November 15, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

13 November, 2007

12 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Barney the Dinosaur



In Toronto they're going to do a trial run with some intersections where there is high pedestrian traffic. These 'scramble zones' will stop trafic in all 4 directions then allow pedestrians to cross from corner to corner; even diagonally if they choose. Another name for 'scramble zones' is 'turkey walks'. Not exactly a leading edge new idea; we had these in my hometown when I was 5 (about 34 years ago).

10 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Auto Layoffs


They say for every job lost in auto manufacturing, there are 4 (and some say as high as 10) other jobs dependant on the industry that are lost... and probably some you'd never think of.

08 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Mass Transit





With all the talk of climate change and global warming it's often mentioned how using mass transit can reduce your carbon footprint. At the same time, the cost of riding the TTC (Toronto Transit Commission) buses and subways, just went up. Go figure.

Cartoon published November 8, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

[Video] MGM Lion spoof

Viewership of my first video submission to YouTube recently passed a milestone of being viewed over 50,000 times. Clink the link below to see my copy of it.





MGM LION?



03 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Condos





Seems like every old abandoned factory in my city are being converted to lofts or condos.

01 November, 2007

[CARTOON] Privacy Issues





In Toronto, the Transit commission (TTC) is installing cameras on all of it's buses and should be done by next May. One man's tool to catch criminals is another man's privacy issue. Some creative entreprenuers might make some money off of this...


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Cartoon published November 1, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

31 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Condos


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You always hear people say,"Oh, I can remember when all this was a [forrest/cornfield/bush/field]", with a sense of longing. If everything reverted back to nature, would we long for the city?

28 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Halloween 2007




"Those who grew up in the 70's would have to agree that things were simpler then. You could take peanut butter sandwiches to school, play on the monkey bars during recess, and ride a bicycle with no headgear. Note: These sentences may contain nuts."


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26 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Football Losing Streak


Recently, the football team from the University of Toronto lost its 48th straight game, setting a canadian university football record to boot. Reminds me of a 'demotivational' poster I saw that said, "You'll always miss 100% of the shots you don't take, and, statistically speaking, 99% of the shots you do."

25 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Know your sieves!


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Inspired by the un-stellar performance of the Toronto Maple Leafs, early in this new NHL season.
Cartoon published October 25, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)

20 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Lead flavoured water


Recently several schools in Toronto turned off their water fountains after water tests showed lead levels of 40 parts per billion. Although there really was no danger of illness from this small amount, the tv stations put on their crisis music and lead with this story. The schools must of been in an affluent area since they replaced the fountains with free bottled water (probably after teaching them how plastic water bottles are bad for the environment). Anyhow, my cartoon is a good compromise...

18 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Crystal Meth


Drug makers pulled cold medicines targeted for babies and toddlers off the market after the Food and Drug Administration and other health groups reported deaths linked to the remedies in recent years, primarily from unintentional overdoses.
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Cartoon published October 18, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
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15 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Campaigning


Ahhh politics. Amazing how there can be numerous issues leading up to an election, only to be dumbed down to one issue for the general populous ( at least where I live ). No wonder there was a record low voter turnout.

13 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Rock, Paper, Scissors


This weekend is the World Champtionship Rock, Paper, Scissors competition in Toronto, Canada. My money is on Spock.

11 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Car Impounded


A few weeks ago, in the area that I live in, a new law was enacted that allowed police to impound your car if you were found street-racing. In about two weeks they impounded over 175 cars. So what did they do in cavemen times?


Published October 11, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 12)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000

09 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Global Warming


Record temperatures, shrinking ice-packs in the Arctic, melting glaciers in Greenland... all signs of Gobal Warming. But no expert has answered my ultimate question: Will global warming cause wiener dogs to grow humps?

06 October, 2007

[CARTOON] Fly in my Soup





An update to the old "There's a fly in my soup" joke with a dash of confrontation, and a frog that appears to have escaped the disecting lab.

05 October, 2007

Blog of the Day Award! [Fuel my Blog]



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I am pleased to announce that my blog has won the Blog of the Day Award from "Fuel My Blog"!

Feel free to vote for me at the following link (with enough votes I might get to win a T-shirt, then I wouldn't have to do laundry for another week!)

http://www.fuelmyblog.com/?c=/pages/vote.jsp?vt=fuel&id=6131

[CARTOON] Those aren't raisins!


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Inspired by a recent news story about a food warehouse that was temporarily shut down by the department of health, after several live rats were found scurrying around during the inspection. Imagine eating your raisin bran one morning only to discover it was really just cornflakes and something shaped like raisins...
>
Published October 4, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)

01 October, 2007

T-shirt contest


Dear Readers,
>
I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY want to win the contest above! I mean, who doesn't want to win a T-SHIRT!? My laundry basket is way too full, and I'm too lazy to wash my clothes, so if I win this T-shirt, I can postpone doing laundry for a full month!
>
To vote for my blog, just visit my blog http://pastexpiry.blogspot.com/ (unless you are already there), go to the section near the bottom of the blog that is title "Please Vote", and click on the "vote for me on fuel my blog" icon. If you are not registered with "Fuel my blog", the registration process is EASY.
>
Did I mention that I like pizza. I really like pizza.. especially Momma's pizza. What I really like to do is put on my pizza eating fez and eat my pizza. Do you like pizza? Do you want some of my pizza? Do you want to wear my fez? Well, you can't! Get your own pizza! Buy your own fez! What makes you think you can eat my pizza? Why should I let you wear my fez? If you want to eat pizza with me you need to get your own. Then you can come over and we can eat pizza together. That would be sweet! But you still can't wear my fez.
>
Here's a link to the competition details:
Regards,
The laundry-challenged

30 September, 2007

[CARTOON] Wedding bells



This past Saturday my younger sister got married, so what better to then a wedding themed post.


Award

Last Friday this blog won the Blog of the day award from a blog ironically called blogofthedayawards:

28 September, 2007

[CARTOON] What's that smell?


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Inspired by a news story of how the cleanup of the Great Lakes is underfunded. I led the readers (and maybe the editor) a little astray..... the two fish are Tuna, and Tuna doesn't live in the Great Lakes. Besides, Tuna are funnier than brown trout.
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Published on September 27, 2007
"24 Hours" (page 6)
http://toronto.24hrs.ca/pdf/cover.pdf
circulation: 354,000
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Please click the various links below to help
share and promote this cartoon:

25 September, 2007

[CARTOON] Goooooooooooooooooooal


An expansion team (Toronto Football club) in the North America's Major League Soccer finally scored a goal after going scoreless for 824 minutes. This broke the old record of 557 minutes. Did Hell freeze over?

24 September, 2007

[CARTOON] Lettuce with E. Coli dressing...


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Is it just me or are there more food recalls these days? In Ontario (Canada) they recently recalled Dole brand bagged lettuce (the kind that is pre-washed and cut up). Well, somehow they got E. Coli contamination. The lettuce in question was called,"Heart's Delight".... maybe they should of called it "Diarrhea Delight".
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Special notice: My "iCig" cartoon is currently showcased on Jane Chin's blog. Check out her medical blog at http://www.nakedmedicine.com/ She even expanded on my cartoon and showed how Apple selling cigarettes would actually be a good thing.
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My blog http://pastexpiry.blogspot.com/ has undergone some redesign. There's still some work to do, but check it out and feel free to send feedback. If you enjoy Past Expiry cartoons, feel free to check out the voting section of my blog (near the bottom) and cast your vote. I cannot achieve my goal of world domination without your help!